Bluey is such a wonderful show. It’s clever, uplifting and funny. It’s loved by children and parents and has taken the world by storm. If you haven’t heard of it, it’s well worth watching.
When Bluey comes up in conversation, I often hear mums make comparisons to Chilli and Bandit. They feel bad for not playing with their kids so beautifully and so often like Bluey’s parents do. They want to but don’t know how to do it. They can feel guilty and down on themselves.
I get it. I strive to be a fun mum, who plays with her children, spends time outside each day, hikes our national parks, plays in the creek, and goes to the beach. I love being present with my boys.
For the last five years, I have either been sick whilst pregnant or breastfeeding. I have had a child with a dozen specialists needing constant appointments. Trying to balance work, home life, errands and the mental load is a lot.
Right now I have a preschooler, toddler and baby.
It takes forever to leave the house, even for a walk. I try to breastfeed whilst breaking up sibling fights. I put the baby to sleep and my toddler keeps running into the room yelling. I try to hang washing and have two children crying. I go to the toilet and have conversations about why I sit down to wee but daddy stands up.
If I have a spare minute, I look around at the chaos not knowing whether to duck to the loo alone, make myself lunch, make a coffee (now I’ve boiled the kettle three times), start thinking about what’s for dinner, empty the recycling, reply to that message, fill out that form, clean under the highchair, fill up the birdbath, hang out the washing or wipe down the sink. My toddler wants me to sit down and watch an episode but I know if I do that, I’ll be chasing my tail all afternoon. It’s a constant pull in multiple directions and it’s easy to feel guilty about whatever I’m neglecting in a single moment.
My evenings are spent catching up on the unfinished jobs of the day. Cleaning up, paperwork, watering the garden. Exercise. Time with hubby. Baby is in our room so it’s difficult to tidy, organise or put the light on to read.
My sleep is broken and we often have a child or two in our bed, or on the mattress beside us. We are exhausted.
It’s just so constant and I don’t often have my hands free to drop everything and just play. If I do, it’s often interrupted and just so hard.
That’s ok. I’m doing my best. It’s a stage.
Back to Bluey, it’s helpful to remember, that Bluey is 6 years old and her sister Bingo is 4.
Parenting a school-age child is different to that of a preschooler or toddler. Your capacity is different. You might be getting more sleep at night and be able to get some things done in the day.
They will spend some time at kindy or school and you’ll have breaks from each other.
Their ability to play games is different, even just that much older. They have a longer concentration span. They can take turns. They enjoy playing pretend.
This age group doesn’t need nappy changes or day sleeps. These sisters don’t have a baby sibling requiring constant attention. Chilli isn’t pregnant or recovering from a caesarean section. It’s easier to be present with your children when you have both of your hands-free.
Bluey is also just a cartoon. It’s not real life.
We can strive to be a better version of ourselves and be inspired by the wonderful show that Bluey is, and also remember that no one is perfect. Chilli and Bandit aren’t perfect parents and they’d be the first to admit this.
One day you’ll look back and wonder how you managed it all. How you coped during the wonderfully hard season of little ones.
Keep this in mind to alleviate some of the guilt that comes with not living up to the Bluey standards of parenting. Give yourself some grace. You’re doing the very best you can.
Thoughts? Are you a Bluey fan?
I’d love to connect with you over on Instagram or Facebook. Come and say hi!
Melanie Wegener
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